Change...an integral part of life, yet one of the hardest processes to accept as human beings. People feel helpless when they are faced with the thought of change and often struggle with where to begin. I have found that the best place to begin, is right where you are. Look at it like putting together a jigsaw puzzle. You never question the first piece you begin with. You simply have faith that the end result will bring completion. That is also the most effective way to tackle the process of change within ourselves. If we wait for that perfect moment, like that perfect piece, then we may never begin our quest for self-actualization. Change is hard- it takes courage, strength and discipline. We have to want to change for it to ever last and be authentic.
Many of us may have been victims as children, but over time we became victims of negative behavior patterns. We can change these patterns and become the people we want to be, but first we must acknowledge that we need to change. Once we have faced that calling deep within us to move in a new direction, then we need the courage to start walking. The very core of nature, is change. It is about birth and rebirth. It does not resist that process. Like nature, we to are constantly changing. Whether we recognize it or not. It only makes sense that we should welcome the opportunity to shed our old outdated modes of thinking and interacting with those around us, and strive to become better and newer versions of ourselves. We don't think twice about upgrading our cars or phones for newer more advanced models, yet we do not seem to feel that way about ourselves.
Our daily mantra should be "I embrace change in myself and others." Change is scary because of its intrinsic rippling effect. When someone close to us changes, it challenges us to adjust and possibly re-evaluate ourselves and that can make us feel angry and resentful. especially if we are not open to change. We have to allow and encourage other's personal growth. We cannot be selfish and expect that our loved ones should not upset the apple cart because of how it might affect us. We are all here to grow and evolve spiritually. If we are not courageous enough to look deep within ourselves and make a shift, then we should allow ourselves to be inspired by those that do have the courage. Let them be our teachers and flow with them as they evolve in their quest for change. If we cannot do this, then we should bless them and set them free. The time to begin change is right at this moment. So pick up that first piece of the puzzle and have faith that the final picture will be you as the perfect being you deserve to be. Namaste
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Monday, April 4, 2011
Realizing That Our Fears Have Power Only If We Let Them
Fear is a part of our biological makeup. It reminds us that we are human and motivates us to recognize danger and act appropriately. As children we all recall being frightened by something. For many of us, it was a hideous creature lurking under our beds or dwelling in the cavernous realms of our closets. In reality, those monsters were only figments of our imagination and a byproduct of our struggle for autonomy. As adults, it can be easy to give into our fears and find ourselves once again like those frightened children clinging to our teddy bears and waiting for our parents to reassure us that we are safe. The first step in not falling prey to our fears, is to recognize them as they rear their nasty little heads and then to realize that they only have as much power as we allow them.
Some fears are legitimate. They speak to us about things we need to address. For example, if we don't pay our electric bill on time, then we face the reality of having our lights turned off. These little fears are a part of day to day living and simply keep us moving in the way society expects us to move. Yet other fears can be more then gentle reminders of the things we are expected to do in order to be deemed responsible. There are the fears that are like the pre shocks of an earthquake. they start off small but if we give them too much power, they can have catastrophic effects.
Although most people don't realize it, The anatomy of a fear is quite precise for each individual. It starts out like thus. Someone is arguing with their partner about money and makes an angry comment about how irresponsible the other is. Sure enough, there might be some validity in that, but the person is too angry and hurt to recognize it. They hurl back accusations and both people storm off angry. The person who was accused of being irresponsible begins to ruminate and rather than vow to find resolution continues to feel angry and resentful, indignant even. What they fail to realize is that the schemas in their subconscious mind have hooked on to past unresolved experiences where they might have been told they were irresponsible. So now, the fear and insecurity kicks in and regardless of whether there was any truth to the accusation or not, the center of the brain where fear is regulated has fledged a full blown attack.
In order to understand fear, we first to accept that we all have ingrained patterns of dealing with and resolving problems. Some of you are crying out, "But wait, I really DO have something to be afraid of. I lost my job and they are going to come and repo my car any day. How can I NOT be afraid?" That is a valid question. Of course one would be fearful in a situation like that. Yet, rather than allow yourself to ruminate and let the fear paralyze you into inactivity. Try to break the cycle of fear and look back on all the times in the past when you were at your darkest hour and things did somehow work out. It is not that the fears are being ignored, they are just not being indulged like a spoiled child. It means taking an honest look at the fear and being clear that you are not reacting to all of your past fears turning this moderate wave into a tsunami.
Fear is part of our lives and as human beings we will always come up against it. Yet, when we know how to respond to it, then we become empowered and fear no longer has the ability to run our lives. Treat fear like a child. It needs to be guided and disciplined because it has not developed enough to be independent of its parents. A child can't be allowed to do what it wants, or it would become out of control and have no boundaries. When fear pops into our minds. Acknowledge its existence and be patient with it, but don't indulge it. Examine its validity and be certain that you are not confusing a current fear with unresolved childhood fears. Growth takes courage and fear can be one of the greatest opportunities for emotional maturity if we allow it to be. Go ahead. What are you afraid of? Namaste
Some fears are legitimate. They speak to us about things we need to address. For example, if we don't pay our electric bill on time, then we face the reality of having our lights turned off. These little fears are a part of day to day living and simply keep us moving in the way society expects us to move. Yet other fears can be more then gentle reminders of the things we are expected to do in order to be deemed responsible. There are the fears that are like the pre shocks of an earthquake. they start off small but if we give them too much power, they can have catastrophic effects.
Although most people don't realize it, The anatomy of a fear is quite precise for each individual. It starts out like thus. Someone is arguing with their partner about money and makes an angry comment about how irresponsible the other is. Sure enough, there might be some validity in that, but the person is too angry and hurt to recognize it. They hurl back accusations and both people storm off angry. The person who was accused of being irresponsible begins to ruminate and rather than vow to find resolution continues to feel angry and resentful, indignant even. What they fail to realize is that the schemas in their subconscious mind have hooked on to past unresolved experiences where they might have been told they were irresponsible. So now, the fear and insecurity kicks in and regardless of whether there was any truth to the accusation or not, the center of the brain where fear is regulated has fledged a full blown attack.
In order to understand fear, we first to accept that we all have ingrained patterns of dealing with and resolving problems. Some of you are crying out, "But wait, I really DO have something to be afraid of. I lost my job and they are going to come and repo my car any day. How can I NOT be afraid?" That is a valid question. Of course one would be fearful in a situation like that. Yet, rather than allow yourself to ruminate and let the fear paralyze you into inactivity. Try to break the cycle of fear and look back on all the times in the past when you were at your darkest hour and things did somehow work out. It is not that the fears are being ignored, they are just not being indulged like a spoiled child. It means taking an honest look at the fear and being clear that you are not reacting to all of your past fears turning this moderate wave into a tsunami.
Fear is part of our lives and as human beings we will always come up against it. Yet, when we know how to respond to it, then we become empowered and fear no longer has the ability to run our lives. Treat fear like a child. It needs to be guided and disciplined because it has not developed enough to be independent of its parents. A child can't be allowed to do what it wants, or it would become out of control and have no boundaries. When fear pops into our minds. Acknowledge its existence and be patient with it, but don't indulge it. Examine its validity and be certain that you are not confusing a current fear with unresolved childhood fears. Growth takes courage and fear can be one of the greatest opportunities for emotional maturity if we allow it to be. Go ahead. What are you afraid of? Namaste
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