Believing We Are Enough

At what point in our lives will we stop believing that we are not enough? From the moment we are born,society brain washes us into believing that our happiness exists outside of ourselves in people, places and things. This external,conditional love we seek has the power to make us or break us. Sadly, we never realize that the chains that we perceive are setting us free, are actually enslaving us and only we have the key. If we give external factors the power to jerk us around and control our happiness, then we will always feel powerless and dependent on everything but ourselves. One day our spirit will wake up and realize that all we need is right here and right now in this very moment. All we have to do is start listening to the voice inside of us that says " I am enough."

Websters dictionary defines happiness as "A state of well being and contentment." I agree with this definition, I also believe that true happiness can not be obtained externally. While it may feel as if love, success, material wealth, etc are the source of our happiness, I would say that they are conditional and can not offer constant or even lasting happiness. Many argue that constant happiness is impossible. Of course none of us are elated 24-7-We have good days and bad days. I am referring to the kind of happiness that exists at a cellular level-a calm and constant, internal voice that tells us no matter what, we are enough. Many of us are guilty of living our lives in holding patterns, waiting for the perfect partner to come along, or the perfect job, etc. Some how, we convince ourselves that when these external conditions finally arrive, then we will experience true happiness. It is almost as if we have resigned to exist in this state of limbo until our ship arrives. For many, it does arrive and eventually it sails off, leaving them once again searching the horizon for the next ship to dock.

When I write these blogs, so many people ask me..."well, what is the answer...how do I do this?" The truth is, I don't know. I can only share what I have discovered for myself through my own experience, strength and hope. Each person has to find their own way. I believe that all of us has a unique path to follow in this life. Just like happiness, we have to seek our own answers inside ourselves, not from others. We can listen to others and observe their journey, but their answers belong to them alone, not us. I would say, stop looking to others to help you find your answers and trust that when the time is right, your soul will know exactly what to do.

I struggled spiritually for so many years looking outwardly for guidance from others. It never lasted, because they were not my answers-I was just merely bowering them. Eventually over time, I would find myself back in the same boat, lost and confused. I was trying to find my way using someone else's road map and not creating my own. That is not to say that the words of others are not valuable and even instrumental in inspiring us. What I mean is that at the end of the day, we have to walk our own lone path. It is simply part of our soul's necessary evolution. One day we have to wake up and learn to trust ourselves and create our own answers.

There is a place that is often overlooked and that is the state of "in between." As humans we tend to look at things black and white. We are either here or there, it is either then or now.... Those "in between" periods when we feel as if we are not growing or evolving are actually very powerful periods. When a seed is under the ground preparing to sprout-we cannot recognize its value, it is only when we physically see it shoot up from the ground that it takes on meaning. That dormant stage of a seed's process is similar to our own spiritual growth. Our soul is always evolving, even if we cannot see it. We just have to trust like that seed preparing to sprout-we too have a natural course to follow spiritually and in time we will blossom into exactly the person source intended us to be. Namaste.

Believing That We Are The Master Of Our Own Fate

The universe doesn't have feelings or empathy for us. Think of it as a canyon-when you yell into it, it reverberates with the sound of your own voice. What you want in this life, you create, by speaking clearly into the universe. Your hopes, aspirations, dreams, etc.. echo back to you. But first, you must be clear about what it is you want and stop waiting for life to happen to you. Clarity is the key when manifesting happiness. If we don't know what we really want, then how can it ever be manifested? Many individuals think they know what they want, yet they remain unhappy and unfulfilled. The key to happiness depends upon discovering "who" we are and learning to love ourselves unconditionally. It may sound like "new-age" mumbo jumbo, but if you are constantly punishing yourself for past mistakes or your shortcomings, then you will sabotage your desires. They will be trumped by your subconscious negative thoughts and self-talk.

Many individuals believe that love, success, physical beauty, etc will bring them happiness and they tell themselves that they want it, yet many subconsciously sabotage that desire and remain in idle. When it comes to the messages we tell ourselves, messages like: "If I found a partner I would be complete," or "If I got that 'perfect' job then my life would be meaningful, " etc., we pay lip service to it, yet what we are unconsciously telling the universe may be quite the contrary. We have to "know" that we "know" that we "know" what we want and that must first begin with knowing "who" we are and accepting ourselves on a deep subconscious level. Our plan has to be definite, purposeful...untainted by contradiction-otherwise we will get back from the universe exactly what we put out there.....mixed messages. We have to be willing to look inside ourselves and face this process head on....no revervations. It isn't easy because most people just don't know where to start.

If your life is not reflecting all that you want and desire, then perhaps it is because you are not clear with yourself about what those things are. Many of you are probably thinking, Hey wait a minute, I know that I want to be in a loving relationship, or that I want to be successful- My question is, "Then why aren't you...what is stopping the process?" It is so easy for all of us to blame everything and everyone around us for our unhappiness...including God or the universe- It takes courage to look at ourselves and ask ourselves what part we play in all this. When was the last time you really challenged yourself and took responsibility for your own happiness...have you ever? If not....then start right now. it isn't impossible-it just takes desire, courage and commitment. If your unhappy with yourself, then chances are your unhappy with your life. Let's face it-none of us really wants to hear that-We would rather point the finger at external circumstances.

The place to begin is right here-right now. It means first being open to the possibility that you might be standing in your own way of happiness. It means asking questions like; Do I love myself or even know what that means, could I subconsciously be blaming or punishing myself for past events or circumstances, can I forgive myself for my mistakes and disappointments. This might sound like more over-used "self-helf" nonsense, but I assure you it is not. Everything is made up of matter and energy...that isn't philosophy that is science. What we believe, the thoughts we produce, they too are matter and energy. If we think good thoughts, then those good thoughts echo back to us. If we are unconsciously thinking about negative things, we may not even realize that those thoughts have the power to echo back from the universe conflicting with all of those good thoughts we are consciously thinking about. The question here is-are you sabotaging your happiness? Once again if your praying for amazing things to happen, but amazing things aren't coming back...I challenge you to ask yourself why? Look inward and ask yourself what you might be doing to stand in your own way.

Tonight before you drift off to sleep,close your eyes, breathe deeply and look deep within yourself-tell yourself that you are ready to be happy. Give yourself permission to do so by asking your higher self for the courage to begin this process. Even if you don't have a clue how this is going to happen-just be open to the possibility. Imagine yourself happy and what that would feel like. Be clear about what you want and then have your higher self tell yourself that together you will begin this journey.....you have taken the first step.....congratulations. namaste!

Believing In The Power Of Our Imagination

Nelson Mandela once said "The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear." Fear is a normal part of our biological makeup. It is the flight and fight mode that is the front man in our ability to survive. Yet not all fear is good- Most of our fears are self-created. From the beginning of time fear has been part of mankind. First man was motivated by fear to survive in a hostile world. Then other men instilled fear into the weak. The bible states " Fear God and keep his commands: for this is the whole duty of man." As of late with the state of the economy and the fear the government has enslaved man with- one has to wonder why the words printed on the dollar don't read "In God We Fear." Fear....it has been the cause of wars, slavery, poverty. When Jung described both the individual and collective "shadow" of man...clearly he was describing man's fears. One of our greatest struggles as human beings, is to learn to not let our fears run with free rein. This is the area where control is a friend and not foe. What are we afraid of? It's different For every individual-each of us with a closet full of named and unnamed fears.

Einstein wasn't a genius just because he formulated the Theory of Relativity; he was a genius because he tried to teach man about the greatest untapped power of all...his imagination. What happened to our ability to fantasize, day dream and pretend? As children it was part of our daily lives...then one day for so many it just became something called upon when helping out with last minute school projects or nostalgic moments of "what if." Perhaps we missed the boat on what a powerful tool our imaginations can be in transforming our lives. Why are we programed in society to focus on the negative and not the positive? Of course that is meant to be a rhetorical question, because at any given moment we have the power to change. If someone told you that they could offer you a way to be happy beyond your wildest dreams-wouldn't you be the first to wave your arms frantically yelling "yes...me, me." Well, I am telling you that you can be happier beyond your wildest dreams if you just tap into the greatest resource you have-your imagination.

The nay sayers are already rolling their eyes and using programed negative self-talk to construct an argument. "Well, I recently lost my job, and my mother is dying of cancer.....my imagination can't change THAT!" Nope-it sure can't...but imagining a time when things were better or imagining the endless possibilities ahead is such a nicer way to live life. Change what you can and accept the rest as part of life. Why is it so much easier for us to imagine the worst when it takes the same effort to imagine the best? For so many, the power of imagination has become about letting fears consume their daily lives and imagining the worst like Fear of being alone, fear of being stuck in a bad relationship, fear of growing old, fear of dying, fear of not having enough money to retire...and on and on and on. When was the last time you imagined something wonderful? If you take the time daily to close yourself off to your fears, I guarantee you that over time you will begin to imagine less about the bad and more about the good. Just try it. Each day for a few minutes...imagine your life the way you want it to be...the person you want to be....smile and really experience it. And the next time a fear pops up....use your imagination to challenge the fear by imagining something good....When you imagine all you want to be and all that could be...then you cannot help it be. Namaste

Believing that labels don't define us

When people claim they want to "find themselves," or ask the question "who am I?" what does that really mean? As human beings we are conditioned to identify ourselves and others with labels such as: intelligent, funny, creative, etc., but these are just labels and don't really define "who" we are. Who we are is much more abstract and significant than just labels or characteristics. As children we learn to navigate the world by attaching labels or characteristics to things. Kittens become something that are fuzzy and purr and fellow humans become identified by their own distinct characteristics. But once again do those labels and chacteristics really define "who" we are as spiritual beings?

When we question "who we are" perhaps it is more about us wanting to feel accepted, valued or to possess a sense of belonging in the world on a more basic spiritual level. When people feel lost or adrift maybe they have spent far too many years looking outward for validation and have allowed labels to define them and once these labels are stripped away or questioned-they are left feeling confused and vulnerable. Perhaps if they stopped looking outside of themselves for answers and just listened....truly listened they might hear their spirit calling out to them to reconnect- Like a faraway voice calling out from the distance offering hope to one lost and frightened in a blinding blizzard.

The question "who am I?" may just seem like just an existential cliché but it isn't. It is the one question that challenges us from the moment we are born and for most until the end of our days. While it might affect people in varying degrees- at some point every human being will confront this existential dilemma. The question we must ask ourselves is not just "who am I?" but what labels have I allowed myself to be defined by? And more importantly, "can I let go of those labels?" If we are not smart, funny, strong, kind, then how can we define our existence? Perhaps discovering who we are is less about the labels or characteristics that "describe" us and more about our personal sense of "self" or spirit. If we strip all the labels and characteristics which describe us on a cognitive level, then what we are left with is just our souls...undefinable. Our spirit's only purpose is to love and be loved....pure and simple. First our cognitive or conscious mind must accept this simple truth and learn to love "self" or "spirit" unconditionally void of any labels or conditions. Once we achieve this then our love of "self" becomes "who" we are. It is what defines us and our purpose here on earth. We no longer are living externally but internally and all of those labels become meaningless.

How do we learn to love ourselves? Here is the cliff-hanger; we don't HAVE to learn...we already do. Our cognitive mind has gotten in the way with all of these labels and conditions that we have allowed to define our existence, sense of worth, our very being. Somehow along the way, we have begun to believe that we must somehow become "worthy" of love by proving ourselves or earning it-yet our spirits know otherwise. This aching deep within us,this restlessness that makes us feel like something is missing...that is our subconscious mind trying to tell us that we are enough...that we have always been enough. When we can let go of all of those external things that define us and look internally at the amazing spirit that we were given as a gift at birth....then we will feel complete and we will no longer be asking "who am I" We will know that we just "are" and that is enough. Namaste

Believing We All Have A Purpose

The one mantra that I always hear is "What is my purpose in life? I to have heard that mantra resounding in my own head for the entirety of my life. I have always felt that somehow I was meant to do something great. Yet as of late I have come to believe that our purpose as humans may be less about doing great and more about being great. Learning to love ourselves and realize that we are enough is the greatest achievement of all. Society brainwashes us into believing that unless we achieve external accolades then we are somehow not successful in life. There seems to be far too little emphasis on the importance of internal success. Life becomes more about what we have rather then who we are.

Who are you? Have you taken the time to recognize yourself separate from others, and your achievements? Learning that "who" we are is not relational to "what" we do. Societal expectations are likened to that of a prisoner who has suddenly realized that his cell was never locked and he could have walked out at any given moment. Viktor Frankl is a perfect example of living internally. Despite all the degradation he endured while a prisoner at Auschwitz-he believed that man only suffered if he allowed external conditions to enslave him. He stated "A thought transfixed me: for the first time in my life I saw the truth as it is set into song by so many poets, proclaimed as the final wisdom by so many thinkers. The truth -- that love is the ultimate and the highest goal to which man can aspire. Then I grasped the meaning of the greatest secret that human poetry and human thought and belief have to impart: The salvation of man is through love and in love." Quite simply, Frankl believed that by dwelling in the spiritual domain where there existed true self-love....he could find refuge from suffering.

Society speaks a lot of religion and the path to God....yet much little about the path to self. Everywhere we look we are encouraged to seek external gratification. Through love and partnership, work and success. We build our lives and self- worth on a foundation of uncertain external circumstances...then when those circumstance changes, we feel frightened and confused. Then angry and often hopeless. The problem is not that we reached outside ourselves for gratification-it is that we placed all our worth on those things. nature has much to teach us about change, as it is always changing. Our cores should be like the ocean. When a storm ravages the sea, on the surface it is violent-yet beneath the surface it remains calm. This is how we must live our lives. We must have a strong core that reminds us each and every moment that regardless of what is happening externally... inside we are enough....unaffected.

Ironically, the first thought for many who read these words will be "how do I do this? How do I live internally?" once again looking outward for the answer. The answer is simple-you just do it. There is no great secret. You begin to use self-talk to be your own counsel. Einstein was not brilliant just because he discovered the theory of relativity-he was brilliant because he understood the power of imagination. Our imagination is our greatest untapped resource. We have this amazing gift of creating whatever reality we choose for ourselves-yet we still look outward for other's to lead the way. Use your imagination next time you have a problem. Lie down, close your eyes and create a person in your imagination that you can talk to and who can listen. Be detailed about what they look like, where they are, how they make you feel. Eventually over time with patience and practice- you will realize that this person is your higher self and they have all the answers you need. Go to this place each day and I promise you over time-you will see changes in your life. You will begin to live internally. You will begin to trust that you have all your own answers. I wish you luck on this path...Namaste

Believing That True Happiness Is Living Our Lives Internally

Authentic self-esteem should be stationary and unaffected by outside conditions. Individuals with a strong sense of self-value can separate who they are from external factors. Like a ship on the sea, they don't let the waves knock them off course-they are able to overcome the conditions. Unfortunately far too many individuals allow people and life's circumstances to define their happiness. They are not able to separate who they are from outside conditions. This makes for a life of constant ups and downs-they are like a boat tossed about on the sea of life.

True happiness should be a constant state of self-fulfillment-not relational to what is happening outside of ourselves. When we stop allowing external circumstances to define our happiness then we experience true freedom. How do we not allow external factors(people, events, etc) to affect our happiness? First we have to face the painful reality that we are telling ourselves that we are not enough, thereby allowing those external factors to manipulate our sense of self. Until we recognize this we will never be free from it. Once we are able to separate circumstances from our sense of worth, then we can change it. When we feel that knot in our gut that tells us we are allowing people, things, events to manipulate us, we have to stop and take hold of the situation. We have to make a conscious decision to act as our own counsel- use self-talk to soothe ourselves and redirect ourselves back inward. We take our power back by making the conscious decision to do so. It is that simple.

We have to learn to separate ourselves from the external circumstances in our lives. We must learn to live our lives internally. In other words, we are not the external labels that we might be experiencing such as "poor," "single," "unemployed," etc. These are just outside factors or conditions existing in our lives-they do not define who we are as spiritual beings. We are born into a culture that programs external living. we are not taught as children to live our lives internally. If we look inward then we are told we are being selfish. Who we are is our own decision-our birthright. It should be a constant. Far too many of us see ourselves AS the external conditions in our lives. We feel bad because we are unemployed, unable to find a mate, struggling financially, or feel burnt out in our jobs or lives. If we cannot consciously separate ourselves from these external factors, then like a victim being robbed, we simply hand over our personal power and become victims of circumstance.

Realizing that we are not the external factors in our lives, might very well be the key to happiness. As a spiritual being, we can never truly be happy if we don't separate WHO we are from all of the external circumstances in our life. These are only illusions of happiness-they are not stationary like our souls. If we constantly give our power away to them, then we will never be balanced or genuinely fulfilled. I encourage you to step back and separate yourselves from the external factors presently in your life. What you will have left to face is yourself. Talk to yourself and gently remind your soul that your true essence is not conditional on these factors. They are only illusions that you have placed your power in. True happiness and self-fulfillment comes to us when we can strip away the false notion that anything outside of ourselves can ever offer us true lasting happiness.
Namaste.

We Cannot Learn To Live Until We Have Mastered An Understanding of Death

Death, the final frontier or the signal of another birth for our spirits? From the moment we are born, we are aware of our mortality. It is all around us. People are born and people die. We focus so much on the beginning and the end that we can easily forget to embrace the moment. What if someone were to tell you that death was not the end but simply your spirit leaving this physical body and returning to source. Once it left this body, it's spiritual journey continued, never ending. Would you live your life differently knowing that death was not the end, and spirit continues to exist and grow? Most of us don't cognitively want to acknowledge our lives eventually ending. It scares us to think that we will die and no longer be in this physical realm. For many death is frightening because we are confused about where we go afterwards.

Most Christians believe that they will go to Heaven, yet there are many people still left wondering where they will end up. The reality is if we hang on to this notion of dying too tightly, then our fear may keep us from fully living. Each of us has to come to terms with death in our own way. For many years I never questioned death much. Perhaps that was just the invincibility that youth brings. Something changed after I had my children. I began to worry about what would happen to my children if I were to cross over. This new question of death began to bleed into my life and that terrified me. I would lie awake at nights questioning and pondering where we go after we leave our bodies, and if this was it.

During a recent meditation, something magical happened. It was as if a calming voice told me that death was only the end of our flesh and not our spirits. After we left this physical body, our spirits moved on. Whether we came back again was up to us. I did not question it. It made sense and I somehow understood it. Does that mean that I still won't feel afraid to die? No, it just means that the question of where I go, the question of death's finality has been answered for me. learning to let go of the physical plane is hard for those spirits that love life and their 'humanness.'

There is calmness in the wake of this realization for me. While I want to stay here on earth and drink in all of her beauty, I also know that when my time is up, I will continue to exist on a different plane. I will grow and evolve and begin a new journey either back on earth or somewhere else. None of us can ever say what is. Einstein suggested that there were different planes or platforms existing simultaneously. Perhaps that is where we exist after we leave our physical bodies. We write our own script here on earth. We also write our own spiritual script after we leave. Only we can decide for ourselves what is right for us and for our own personal spiritual journey. Being open to the idea that we shift from one plane to another may help us live our lives here on earth to the fullest. Namaste!